A Thousand Deaths

And so I’ve died a thousand deaths. One for each lie I've been told, knew about it and accepted it anyway. And I'm ok with that. Because some deaths spawn growth; like skin cells.

I don't doubt my intelligence. And I don't have to walk around telling everyone how intelligent I am to breathe it true. The instinctive replication of my life's values will do that automatically. My mere desire to exist beyond that of something that breathes is the answer to my query on the importance of life over death. Or is it that I care more about death over life? I use one up to get to the other, so that just might be it. But I’m nosey. I must see where it is I’m going. So I ask myself if it is possible to die and then experience life thereafter? Not physically, insomuch as I know it, but perhaps spiritually. And so I look forward to each death that recreates me.

The triumvirate solicitation of knowledge, experience and innate senses justifies my thousand deaths, so long as I never die them again. For repetitious mistakes made that way will surely lead to death; if not death of body, then definitely a fate far worse: Death of spirit. It is the equivalent of keeping a man alive after sentencing him to life for murder. You are dead while living because the hope of furthering your growth is dead. No amount of milk, which strengthens bones, fiber which strengthens the heart or books which strengthen the mind will help you live past the fate of a dying spirit. It is the building block to life, far beyond our physical bodies; Spirit must remain a growing entity.

And yet to die is to be free. Free from earthly bondage, wrapped tight around our legs like the pants we must wear everyday to work. Wrapped tight around our heads like the hats we wear to keep us from feeling the strength of the sun. Natural wonders may one day wonder how unnatural we have become as we move further and further away from nature, and closer and closer to technology. The air we breathe may one day have to be downloaded first. Then on that day when computers crash, we may all suffer death.

A thousand deaths. Yes, a thousand deaths indeed are upon us like droplets of water in a shower. There used to be a time when we walked around and the only pieces of metal we needed with us were keys and coins. Now we walk around looking like metallic robots. Soldiers of fortune; or perhaps, soldiers of minimum wage, as it were. Instant access to people, money, work and the digital overworld. We have virtually killed off our ability to memorize by committing birthdays, addresses and phone numbers to virtual memory.

So what’s left? We’re suffering weaker minds and weaker bodies. There is a third component we speak of in this trifurcate: There is our soul. Are we at least strengthening our souls? Dear God, let us at least be strengthening our souls. Capitalism pulls at our existence like G-force, pulling us away from the source that binds us all; our souls. Oh goodness. What have we done? You see, as long as you keep your soul intact, you can die a thousand deaths and still live. You can be born again with each new lesson. You can be born again with each new development of self. Anything but the soul can grow weaker!

I immediately regret to say that one soulless death supersedes that of a thousand deaths with soul intact. We must all stop, turn around and soldier back to the source less we be dead forever.